It's definitely not the first time that Rob has gone radio silent for days. He doesn't text back. He doesn't show up on Grindr. He doesn't go on the other (cruising) website where we first met. Although we are not in a relationship, I think about him a lot and every time he goes AWOL I wonder if something has happened to him. The night before he was still telling me about policing at Wimbledon and saying we will def meet up tomorrow night.
Four days later, Rob shows up on the website with a randy status, looking for sex. It would appear that he's not dead after all. I have no problem with him shagging whoever. But I am really struggling to understand what's on his mind.
Is he trying to keep me at a distance to prevent anything from developing? The gap in age between us is a very good reason why a relationship might be unrealistic. But he is the one who's talked about taking me to his favourite restaurant. He is the one who's bought me something from the shop. He is the one who's made me breakfast. Now he's got me on the hook.
My little brain cannot make sense of the signals. But I'm not going to ask him when I see him next, because I don't want him to think that I'm getting all serious and worked up. Life wouldn't be so stressful if I could find someone my age, or more straight forward.
No comments:
Post a Comment